Suiting Up

It’s April, the days are stretching out, and the notion of summer is beginning to rumble around in my head. We are back to our regular routine after a brief but quite springy little break.

So yesterday I decide to start the search for a great bathing suit. We are taking a trip with ALL of my husband's co-workers to Hawaii, and I am determined to not look like a suburban mom. It may seem a little pre-mature, but I have been caught too many times in June with nothing left on the racks. Although I am the same weight I was pre-mommy-dom, after two babies, there are few little patches of flesh that need to be either padded or boosted or just plain covered. My pals the stretch marks can be tricky little buggers.
Finding the perfect suit is simply not as easy as it used to be. I went to J Crew first, but quickly discovered that the tiny bikinis would never survive the sand castle building, frisbee throwing, kid carrying, and wave jumping now required of me. Plus I know Truman would be the first to tell me that if he can’t go outside in his underwear, I can’t either.

Next, I hit Nordstrom and found a young salesgirl who promised me she had something that met all my prerequisites. She handed me an awesome BCBG, reversible black and brown halter suit, with a very sexy plunging top. She also handed me some padded inserts for the boob part, and told me it would be great.
She was right….almost. It was sexy enough to catch my husband’s eye, and G rated enough to keep my boys from total embarrassment. And it was ONLY $148.00, not counting the boob implants! I hesitantly showed the bathing suit girl, and told her I was just a bit concerned about the high cut booty section. She insisted that it was the way it was supposed to look.
I decided to get it and show my husband for a true opinion. As I was checking out, I was joking about how much harder suit shopping had become post-kids. She then said, “I think you look really great!….. for having two kids.” Is that like “You look really good… for your age?” I’ve decided to just take it as a compliment.

I slipped into the suit after the kids were in bed, and stood in front of my husband. “Well, what do ya think?” I said. “I think it’s GREAT!” He said.
I then realized that asking a man if too much of your booty or breast is showing, is like asking a three year old if he has too much icing on his cupcake.

I pranced around, bent down, and acted out various mom positions. It seemed like a go, until my husband very dryly said “How are ya gonna reverse it with the “falsies” stitched to one side?” (Pregnant Pause Here)
We then cracked up at the mental picture of me wearing it flipped around with the flesh colored boob pads on the outside.
The only reason I justified the over-priced suit was because it was two suits in one. Plus in the end, I knew I would be tugging the butt down every two seconds.

Dang! Sexy hot mom suit out the window.
I returned the suit today-saved myself 168.00 dollars, and I’m back to square one.
I’ll keep ya posted.